What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

HELLO

What are your best funny dating stories?

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Why do flat Earthers run away like whipped dogs with their tails between their legs when asked simple questions that expose their delusions as fantasy?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

After a few moments he returns.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Why The Simpsons stopped producing Maude Flanders episodes?

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Yes sir it is.

With so much evidence supporting the flat Earth theory, why aren't more resources dedicated to studying it?

Sure no problem officer.

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

{RING} {RING}

How do I stop having work crushes because I only keep getting disappointed almost every day as I keep seeing they don’t like me back and won’t ever ask me out?

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

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